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In response to the antics of athletes the last few weeks, a columnist for Fox Sports logically explained why he is opposed to athletes marrying. I am sorry but I think this is a poor excuse for support of bad behavior. We have become a society where whether we are black or white, we are permissive in bad behavior. I understand the argument that if you are young you shouldn’t get married. I can understand the argument that not everyone is ready for marriage.   I disagree that monetary and professional success dictates a “pick and choose” menu of personal behavior. It is the belief that once presented with a smorgasbord you have no ability to control yourself. It has become hallmark that if you are successful, and have money you are entitled to be promiscuous and irresponsible and unfaithful. That’s 100% unacceptable. It’s even more unacceptable for African Americans due to the fact  one check point of purchasing  slaves  was whether or not he could be a “good buck” or a “good breeder”. Should we fall back into that old stereo type that allows for behavior like McNair’s? The horrifying part of his story is that he has a son who is in early adulthood who has now learned first hand how to handle a mistress.  I think we have thoroughly crossed the threshold where over the edge behavior gains you popularity as being a player.  It is now the comparison of who has the better war stories exchanged in the dressing room, locker rooms and bars.

The true lies that are being sown about the institution of marriage have presented insane logic 1- that it’s not work and 2- that it’s cheaper to keep her. We all laugh about it, but it’s no laughing matter anymore.  We are over run with young ladies who do not know who fathered their children and young men who father too many with little claim to responsibility except the ability to say, “That’s my child.” We are all falling victim to this whole idea that life should be “a whole lot of what you want, when you want, how you want. ”

Unfortunately, with athletes the pipe dream that the bigger better woman is on the horizon somewhere is really why they cheat. It’s true in the music business. It’s true in the board room.  They lock down the “right now woman” and then when they get to whatever level is a great level they pick up “the trophy.” She is often the young misguided woman. This behavior trickles down to my ill-informed and groomed sisters who feel that acting less than ladylike is what will get them the attention that they crave.  When they are left alone they are wondering how they got to this point in the road.

The truth is they got there by jumping into that nice fast car. You can’t go 100mph on the road in life without thinking you won’t have to answer a speeding ticket.

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