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Valentine’s Day is around the corner and I know many are trying to figure out if they have what they need for that special person. Then there are those who don’t have to worry about that kind of stuff, because there is no special person to celebrate V-day with anyway. So why do we let such holidays get us down as it pertains to our personal life? Maybe it’s because the certainty in who we are as people can be in question, or maybe the fact is, it does take someone else to validate who we really are.

I want to challenge you to go beyond the thought pattern of needing someone to validate you. I think it’s important to rock your life your way with you in mind – not someone else. Now you may think that sounds selfish – and I would agree. But you can’t do for others what you haven’t done for yourself. So, yes, sometimes it’s OK to be selfish, evaluate what is going on in your life, and what you need to do to make yourself a better person.  A better you will attract a better people in your life.

Consider the following the next time you want to find or be that funny valentine. First off if you like what you see say it. If  you like who you are be it. If there is something about yourself you don’t like, change it. If there are things about that special someone you don’t like, accept it in a way that is respectful. You don’t have to accept everything that person does, but you can accept who that person is with respect to his or her decision about his or her life.

Why should you take such a stance like this with your life? Because it’s the only way to get through life the way it’s intended. In other words, you were intended to be loved and to love. Also in life you find that sometimes things are just not for you. That there are times when you will be single and there are times when you will have that special someone.  Either way it is OK and life is still worth living through every holiday including V-day.  I find it very healthy to sometimes take the rules off of life that can many times be very judgmental. This is something I’ve learned to do because more success can often lead to more aloneness when it’s all said and done.

I once heard a famous speaker say, “If everything is organized you’re moving too slow.”  Playing it safe is never the way to go when it comes to love or your dreams. I think it’s OK to be careful and smart, but playing it safe or easy is not the way to go. Embrace who you are in every season of your life.  This means that you will enjoy both the high moments and low moments of your life. Easier said than done, I know, but it can be and should be done because again it’s how life is intended to be lived – fully.

We make the mistake of trying to have a love packed Valentine’s Day every year and that’s not necessarily realistic. Because we set this high standard we set ourselves up for great disappointment.  So this Valentine’s season I want to encourage you to fall in love with yourself all over again, because if you love yourself you will be loved even if it’s by the one you have yet to discover.

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